Prince or frog?

"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up: if a boy punches you he likes you, never try to trim your own bangs, and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. every movie we see, every story we're told implores us to wait for it: the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. but sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. how to tell the ones who want us from the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. and maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. maybe the happy ending is just moving on. or maybe the happy ending is this: knowing after all the unreturned phone calls and broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment... you never gave up hope. "

Came across this quote on a friends facebook page, its from the movie He's Just Not That Into You, and thought "how true!!" If you look around at all the teen pregnancies, and broken marriages I bet you will find that it was because of disillusionment! As a girl, I can honestly say that we girls can get disillusioned very easily. We find someone that we think is interested in us and suddenly all their faults and all the little signs that this is NOT "the" one suddenly disappear. Then when its all over we're left wondering what happened, why didn't I see this coming. Now I'm not saying that we need to be cynics, absolutely not!!! Girls, you need to have dreams and get enchanted, but don't get so enchanted that you forget what is important. Does this man love God, does he love you? Are you number one on his list of priorities? Does he have his life in order? Is he capable of supporting you and taking care of you? Is he responsible? Is he respected by his peers? These are just a few things to consider. Because if he isn't it's more than liking that's not going to change and you shouldn't wait around hoping it will. I have the tendency to look past a person's faults and see what they could be, but that doesn't mean that is what they are. Just because someone has the potential to be a good person doesn't mean that they will be. I recently was in a relationship like this. I stayed longer than I should have because I saw what they could be and hoped that I would be the one to make them want to be that better person. But that's not how it goes. The lyrics from the Superchic[k] song Princes and Frogs says, "Look into his eyes are you a princess or a fly?" Does this person see you as something valuable, unique, and important or are you just another girl on their list? Does he value you because of your looks or because of your personality? Girls, don't sell yourself short!! Don't fool yourself into thinking that this "frog" you're with is the best you can do! You don't have to settle!!!! You are an amazing and beautiful girl and someday you will meet someone who sees that and is willing to make sacrifices for you and treat you like you are special. Don't give up hope and most importantly don't give up on yourself! Some frogs will still be frogs and some dogs will still be dogs, but some boys will one day be men. The question is are you willing to wait for the man or will you settle for a frog?

"You found him is what you say And we all want you to feel that way But the frog you've got seems cute enough to kiss And maybe frogs seem like that's all their is But just because you haven't found your prince yet Doesn't mean you're still not a princess And what if if your prince comes riding in While you're kissin' a frog what's he gonna think then So look into his eyes Are you a princess or a fly?
All princes start as frogs and all gentlemen as dogs Just wait till its plain to see What we're growing up to be Cause Some frogs will still be frogs And Some dogs will still be dogs Some boys could become men Just don't kiss us 'til then. " (Princes and Frogs by Superchick)

Hang On!

What do you do when you feel like God has left you hanging? I don't mean hanging from the monkey bars, but hanging from the edge of a cliff. You know sometimes you come to a point in life where you don't what, when, where, how, what kind, what color, what time, how many,... you just don't know. Every decision you have made you haven't made hastily or foolishly. You've thought out and prayed long and hard over every decision and things are going good, for a while. Then all of a sudden you hit a brick wall. Then what? A few years ago I talked about something I had heard in one of my Bible classes. We had discussed how we can know if it's God's voice and how we can know what God wants us to do. Dr. Phil Brown had said when you come to a crossroad and you sit there waiting for God to tell you which way to go, but you receive no reply, then you must make the decision yourself and ask God to close the door if it's the wrong decision. "God won't let you miss out on a once in a life opportunity just because you weren't sure if it was his voice or not." But what do you do when it seems like every road you choose to take ends with a brick wall? And when you turn around and head back to the crossroads again you are met with no answer as to which road to take, so again, you make the decision and again you are met with a brick wall. What do you do? You learn from your mistakes? That may be one reason God has allowed you to make so many wrong choices, but how many mistakes do you have to make before you get it right?
The title I chose for my blog, Run the Earth...Watch the Sky, is taken from a song by Chris Rice. These words always stuck out to me. That's a hard concept to remember. If you're running then you need to be watching where you are going or you could stumble. I know there have been times when I would go jogging, that I have looked up at the clouds or a bird and looked back just in time to miss a rock that could have caused me to stumble. But what if, just what if, we would watch the sky, look to God, would He stop us from stumbling? Would He catch us when we fall? I've been told that He will, and honestly He has for me a couple times in the past. But lately, well, let's just say I've fallen a lot. I've skinned my knees, so to speak, more than once. So much that there are going to be scars and the thing I struggle with the most is why. Why did God not catch me? Why didn't HE pick the road for me to go down instead of allowing me to pick it? Why is He remaining silent? Why has He left me hanging here? Why...? I don't know.
I heard a story about the lyrics to a song by Barlowgirl. Years after the Holocaust some people went into one of the concentration camps and were looking around. They came to one of the cells, a dark, damp cell. And on the wall they saw these words: "I believe in the sun even when it is not shining; I believe in love even when I can't feel it; I believe in God even when He is silent." I may not have the answers to these questions. I may not understand...anything, but I do know that I believe in God, even when He is silent. So, I will continue to cling with all my might to the edge of this cliff. I will NEVER let go!!!!

Hang on when the water is rising

Hang on when the waves are crashing

Hang on just don't ever let go

Hang on when you are barely breathing

Hang on when your hearts still beating

Hang on just don't ever let go

(Hang On by Plumb)

Silenced by God

Have you ever been silenced by God? Last night I was driving home from work, driving had always been my prayer time, but I hadn't really been doing that lately. So last night as I pulled out of the parking lot, feeling a little depressed, I shut off my radio and decided to talk to God. I began crying and I told Him I really needed Him to speak to me, I need this conversation to be two sided. You see this wasn't the first time I had come to Him with this problem, in fact it was the same problem I had been praying about for the past two months. If you were to look in my prayer journal you would see that this had been the topic of every conversation with God. Something that some days I struggle with more than others. As I prayed all of a sudden I felt like I couldn't speak anymore, I've had this happen before where I was so upset that I couldn't form words so I would pray silently. But this was different, I couldn't even pray silently. So instead I drove in silence for at least 5 minutes. There was no audible voice, there were no thoughts that quickly pooped into my mind, there was nothing but silence. It was almost like God was saying, "Enough! I've heard all this before and I'm helping you. Why do you keep picking this burden up and insisting on carrying it after you've given it to Me?"
When I finally was able to speak again, the only words I was able to form where, "Forgive me..." And one thing after another popped into my mind until I had nothing left. I asked for forgiveness for not trusting God, for trying to control things on my own, for... There were a lot of little things that I didn't really see as a big deal, but they were keeping me from finding peace. Nothing has really changed, my problem is still there. I still feel down every once in a while when I think about it, and I probably always will. I still wish things could have been different. I still wish I knew what the future holds for me and what exactly God has in store for me. That's the control freak part of me. I'm not even sure anything was really resolved last night except that I got a few things taken care of and I found some peace. There's just something gratifying, and humbling, about being chastised by God. When God silences you, well, then there is no doubt in your mind that He's heard and He's working on a solution in His time.

A few thoughts

The past few weeks, during my devotions, I keep coming back to a passage in Proverbs 3:4-12. I like the way The Message puts it.

Earn a reputation for living well in God's eyes and the eyes of the people. Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he's the one who will keep you on track.Don't assume that you know it all. Run to God! Run from evil! Your body will glow with health, your very bones will vibrate with life! Honor God with everything you own; give him the first and the best.Your barns will burst, your wine vats will brim over. But don't,dear friend, resent God's discipline; don't sulk under his loving correction. It's the child he loves that God corrects; a father's delight is behind all this.

The part that jumped out at me the most was this. "Earn a reputation for living well in God's eyes and the eyes of the people. Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he's the one who will keep you on tack. Don't assume that you know it all. Run to God! Run from evil!"

How awesome!!! My biggest problem has always been that I try to figure out everything on my own. I want to know the who, what, when, where and how of everything! And while I'm trying to figure all of this out and solve my own problems, I forget to listen for God's direction. But God's voice is in everything I do and everywhere I go. How amazing is that!!! He is the only one who can keep me going in the right direction. If I try to do it on my own, I end up in a mess.

Don't assume that you know it all. I have an awful time with that. I'm 20 years old, that's twenty years of learning things, but I still don't know it all. I will never know all that there is to know! For now I know just what God thinks I need to know, and that's good enough.

Run to God! Run from evil! I love how it first says to run to God and then it makes it clear that running to God and running from evil is one and the same. It's not running in two different directions, it's running in one direction with two purposes; getting closer to God and farther from evil.

These verses have encouraged me in the past few weeks. Now the fact that I have know idea what I'm going to do tomorrow let alone in the next year or two doesn't seem to bother me as much as it used to. Instead, it's almost a relief. I was always one to plan out my whole entire life. I had something that I was going to have accomplished by each year. 19 years old; graduate from GBS; 23 years old; graduate from Hillsdale College, 24 years old; get married, 25 years old; start a family, etc. But my ways are not God's ways. I can't plan out my entire life! I don't have any control over any of that! I don't know it all!!! That used to bother me. I wanted control, I really did. But these verses just seemed to remind me that God is in control and the only thing that I need to worry about is weather my life is pleasing to God. As long as I live my life to please Him, then I don't have to worry. I'll let Him be the one to direct my ways, He's the One who will keep on track.

Trust

It's been awhile since I last posted! Too long, in fact. I'll try to make it up! A lot has happened in the past few months. I miss blogging!! It was always my way of jotting down my thoughts, an outlet of sorts.

The last month has been hard. I've had a lot of disappoints. Things that I don't understand why they happen, but they do. Lately a song has been going through my mind, Let the Waters Rise by Mikeschair. The first verse says: "Don't know where to begin It's like my world's caving in and I tried but I can't control my fear. Where do I go from here? Sometimes it's so hard to pray, you feel so far away. I am willing to go where you want me to. God I trust you." That last phrase has been so hard for me to say. God I trust you. Trust. Such a small word but so hard to do. People will let you down. Friends will disappoint you. Family will disappoint. People you trust will betray you, they will turn their back on you and walk away at the times where you need them the most. But God...He won't. But our human minds don't seem to be able to grasp that. We have a hard time understanding that God is not human, therefore He does not have humans attributes. He has godly attributes. He can be totally and completely trusted. Even when you things happen that make you think, "God, what are doing? This isn't supposed to happen!!!" Trust Him! I'm preaching to the choir here! This is a big issue for me! I've had so many disappoints that its become hard for me to trust anyone, even God.

The chorus of the song says, "There's a raging sea right in front of me. Want to pull me in Bring me to my knees. So let the waters rise if you want them to, I will follow you..." Then it goes on to say, "I will swim in the deep cuz your next to me. You're the eye of the storm and the calm of the sea. You're never out of reach. God you know where I've been You were there with me then You were faithful before, You'll be faithful again. I'm holding Your hand...God Your love is enough! You will pull me through. I'm holding on to You. God your love is enough! I will follow You!"

In the past few months I have felt like I'm in that raging sea; a sea of disappoints, sorrows, forgotten dreams, unattained goals, lost ambitions, unwise decisions. And it feels like all of those things are swelling up doing their best to pull me under. But to be able to stand there and say, "Let the waters rise if you want them to, I will follow you." That takes faith, trust. I want to be able to stand and say, "God whatever comes my way, even if it doesn't make sense, even if I don't understand why You want the sea to rise, I will still follow you. I will trust You! You were faithful before, You'll be faithful again." It doesn't matter how deep my sea may seem, it doesn't even matter how long I have to swim in it. As long as God is next to me! He is the eye of the storm and the calm of sea! I will trust in Him!!!